Bring out your dead

Ant farm

I know you're all dying for an update on the ant farm so here it is. First, the ants Uncle Milton sent are Harvester ants. That means not only do they bite, but they also sting. (Two for the price of one!) Before you can move them from the mailing tube to the ant farm you have to put them in the fridge to "calm them down." Yep. They're big and they're mean.

Bring out your dead

After they moved in they began to survey the landscape. They totally ignored the holes I obediently drilled for them, preferring instead to bury the guys who didn't survive the trip through the US postal service. I didn't see them perform a ceremony, but they have been very diligent in taking care of the dead pile. Someone is usually over there, moving heads and other body parts around the gel. I confess it kinda creeped me out to see a head being carried around in some guy's mandibles.

That's group number one, the morticians.

Stand up meeting

The second group are the executives. They are always in a meeting - the world's longest stand up meetings. It's possible that this is actually a corporate off-site. Or perhaps, since they lack a queen to boss them around and keep things organized, the meeting is just running long. It is illegal to sell queens for obvious reasons, I think. I mean there are people who release pythons into the Everglades and alligators into the sewers, why not release a few million Harvester ants into the backyard, especially after they have overrun their little gel box, right?

Work crew

The third group is the most interesting. They are in charge of construction. They turned their collective noses up at my holes and instead are busy making their own tunnels - just like it shows on the box. I just love it when things turn out like the picture on the box. I think I can count the number of times this has actually happened on one hand.

This ant farm is turning out to be a lot more fun than I thought it would be - and for all of us. I bet you're thinking that we need to get out more and you're probably right. But if you get an ant farm I bet you'll be watching them too. They're nasty little hard working buggers.

If anyone actually drops that plastic box we're going to have a couple dozen biting stinging giant ants running around the kitchen. How much fun will that be?

Comments

[kitty]

[this is good] Wow. I kinda want an ant farm now. I think I had one as a kid, but without ants. It was one my uncle or someone had had in the fifties and by the time I came around 20 years later the ants were long gone. (Did they evaporate? Where were the remains? I think I need to ask my family a few questions....)

[karen]

Perhaps they are in the witness protection program!
The box says that they will only live 1-3 months, but that after they day we can add new ones...

[Paul]

This is oddly interesting.

[Bill]

I'm a little concerned about the ethical ramifications of keeping aunts in captivity, even if they were sent by an uncle. I love my aunts, nutty though they may be.

[Stacy]

[this is good] so cool! thanks for giving us all the dirt on the ants. i love it.

[Winnower]

ew. i hadto say it, even though your writing makeseverything fun... i should have done without the up close pics!

[don't angry up the blood]

[this is good] Surprisingly enough, I am finding this quite interesting. Perhaps I am just a nutter.

[Bookmole]

[this is good] So, you buy ants, they die, you buy new ants, they die, you buy new ants - they have a money maker there, huh? Someone should tell Uncle Milton that it is not nice to hold ants hostage. I was wondering whether you could just fill it with common or garden ants, you know - lure them in. Rather than paying for big ants. Spect they are easier to see! (the big ones, I mean!)

[karen]

Yes, essentially that is how it works. However the ants only cost three dollars and you are guarranteed to get workers, no queen and not a bunch of lazy-assed immaturemales who sit around in their underwear all day watching the game. That's totally worth three bucks in my book. ;-)

[karen]

Ok. I realize that on the surface this may sound a little cruel. But I like to think of it this way: I am giving them a loving home and a sense of purpose. As previously noted, these guysdon't have a queen. Coincidently, I've always wanted to be a queen. I think that makes thisa pretty symbiotic relationship.
What would the aunties be doing if not living here with us? Sighing, making quilts and arguing over gets to host Sunday dinner. With me they feel needed.

[Moxie Mouse]

I find that virtual ant farm is far more compelling for me than real ant farm. Keep us posted. :)

[Bookmole]

$3 for workers, no lounging around, no pretyy-ass queens going I am the one, Me. Me. Me OK, yes, that is well worth the money. I would even pay more for that!

[The K Spot]

Tres cool! So I guess they no longer make ant farms with sand, huh. I suddenly feel ancient.

[karen]

Never fear. They do make them with sand. I just thought the gel looked cool.

[sharpstick]

[this is good] These sets are a lot of fun. We had one for the boys and they loved watching them go. I think we messed up and fed them too much or something because they all died at the same time. =P

[karen]

You should not blame yourself. I think that's exactly how it is supposed to work: with no queen to keep things going they finally get old and die. Then, just like the dinasaurs, they drop dead overnight.
$3 to Uncle Milton will get you a whole new team. ;-)

[sharpstick]

Yeah, a bunch of blood thirsty teamster ants that have bad attitudes and don't mind carrying thier dead buddies heads around!

[al]

interesting that the medium is that green gel, and that the ants don't seem to mind